super duper fucked up!

serious shit super duper fucked up! i hate myself rite now! i am 24. n every step of my behavior doesnt resemble my age. its like im juz 14 years old. 4 to be worse. i wont grow. i am not matured. im still cursing! im still hot tempered. im still ill mannered. im still a rude person. i say mean things to my loved ones. i hurt them unintentionally. i dont think i can change me! its hard!! like super duper hard!!! damn it! i feel like cursing right now! FUCK! hah amek kau kan dah mencarut!

even cursing wont get this feeling off my chest!